I Will Never Say “I need to lose weight” Again

For a while I thought society was changing. Seeing body positive messages everywhere made me believe that I was now acceptable, that my size didn’t matter. But the real truth is that I stopped holding myself to the standard that society prescribes. I came to the realization that by giving others the opinion that I felt I needed to lose weight, gave them permission to think that as well.

I figured that I could be socially acceptable if I let people know that I was trying to lose weight, that I was “working on it”.

I will never say it again, and I encourage, but don’t prescribe, that others do the same. When you say things like…I need to lose weight. When you put yourself down, and even when you do the smaller things like post pictures on social media of other women’s bodies, the body that you maybe want, others will see you the way that you see yourself. As not “that woman”, as someone fat who can’t lose weight.

So what do I want them to see? I want them to see that I am perfect just as I am. I want them to see that I can never have another woman’s body, because I am not her. I am not eating vegetables to make my thighs smaller, I am eating vegetables because they are healthy for me. I am not exercising because I should in order to be a “Work in progress” fat girl. I do it to keep my heart pumping.

And when I see others posting about losing weight, or talking about it, I remember that I was them once. I once gave others permission to see me in a negative light. I see thin women posting about weight loss, larger women posting about weight loss, it doesn’t matter who you are or what your body looks like. Your body is yours, and you are beautiful. Don’t give the world the satisfaction of labeling your body.

Take the pledge to remove the words from your vocabulary, put “I need to lose weight” in the past, and embrace your beautiful self, every bump and curve.

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Things that are worse than being fat

Of all the problems that exist in this world, let’s put size into perspective.

Things that are worse than being fat:

  • Being rude
  • Having cancer
  • intimate partner violence
  • Not being legally allowed to marry the person you love
  • Being addicted to substances
  • Not having cats in your life
  • Breakups
  • Children going hungry
  • Adults going hungry
  • Animals going hungry
  • Not having a home
  • Not having access to clean drinking water
  • Being in Jail
  • Losing someone you love
  • Getting attacked by bears while trying to have a picnic
  • Human Trafficking
  • tornados
  • Global warming
  • Animal extinction
  • The return of dinosaurs (could happen)
  • A Zombie apocolypse (Will happen, are you prepared?)
  • Running out of cookies
  • Running out of coffee
  • Being bitten by misquitos
  • Sexually transmitted diseases
  • Inequality
  • Running out of rum.
  • Murder
  • Breaking your favourite mug
  • Getting into a car accident.
  • Mental health problems.
  • Having someone drop by unexpectedly and your place is a disaster.
  • The plague
  • Reality TV
  • Accidentally drinking sour milk
  • Getting jail time for a crime you didn’t commit
  • Having a miscarriage
  • Breaking a limb
  • Losing a limb
  • Living in a country at war
  • Dying young
  • Living in a haunted house
  • Getting in a fight
  • Regret
  • Disrespect
  • Not having a place that makes you feel safe
  • Finding your first grey hair
  • Nightmares
  • Sinkholes.

I would rather be fat than experience these things, and many more awful things. Feel free to comment if you have any to add.

Remember that you are beautiful just as you are, and your size isn’t really that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things.

If You Claim To Be Worried About Obesity, This is Why You Should Support The Body Love Movement

I have kept my silence for a long time about the Body Love Movement, mostly biding my time for when I had something different to say. Keep in mind that I believe 100 percent in body love, all sizes, all shapes are good just as they are. And my shape…is that I am a curvy lady that has been sitting on the sidelines of this discussion. I believe that whether you are thin, athletic, curvy, bodacious, fat, plush…however you wish to identify yourself, you have a beautiful body.

However there is a group of people out there, who are concerned about our health as “overweight” individuals. As crazy as this sounds, a part of me understands the perspective that they are coming from, and I think some of them are trying to be genuinely helpful. They make comments like “If you tell fat people they are beautiful, it promotes obesity.” or “I am just concerned about their health. Obesity leads to so many health concerns” But here’s the problem.

Though a growing amount of bigger people are finding love with their bodies and would prefer to stay their big beautiful shape, there are also some of us who feel trapped in our bigger bodies. You have all these people who are self conscious. Millions of people. And for some of these people the reason is that they really want to lose weight, and they feel they eat an unhealthy amount of food. Those who don’t want to “support or promote obesity” are basing their viewpoint on the perception that if people love their bodies, they will just continue to eat more and more food until they consume mountains of daily food and never leave their house to exercise because happy content people don’t feel the need to exercise (obviously).

If you are one of these people unfortunately you do not have an understanding about how self esteem works. I challenge you to understand that when people feel good about their bodies, when they love their bodies, when they feel sexy and beautiful and happy…they will become who they are meant to be. It isn’t going to spiral them into a food loving non-exercising hermit.

IN FACT….telling someone that they aren’t beautiful, that they don’t meet your standards, that they can’t be happy, or enjoy themselves, or that no one will love them as they are….THAT is what will turn us into food devouring shut ins because lets face it, when something bad happens to me and I feel emotional my first thought is…I would really like some comfort food, and to hide for a million years. If you want to make ME obese, by all means, continue as you are in your denial of the importance of this societal change. When I see inspiring pictures of beautiful big women that look like me (or a variety of shapes), I want to go for a walk, I want to run and jump for joy, because I am so happy! When someone compliments me and tells me I am beautiful, my whole world changes. If I love myself, I want to be healthy (Whatever healthy means for you). Some people are healthy and they are larger, and we all need to be fine with that too. I am talking about people who don’t identify with being healthy because they have that low self esteem caused by the world’s perception of them.

So in conclusion, if you care about us, if you care about our health, and our mental well being, support the Body Love Movement, because your insults are not motivating, insults are insults and they are hurtful. Love is motivating, compliments and praise are motivating. Motivate us to be happy and healthy by showing the love (instead of the hate) to the Body Love Movement.

Note: On the same token, curvy girls, when we see our skinny sisters, love their bodies too, because in some circumstances they may have an eating disorder or emotional problems, similar to ours, and by saying comments like “I am a REAL woman” or “Ew eat some food” or “God she looks terrible”….are skinny shamming and should not be ok. Fight for the love of ALL bodies.